Thursday, November 13, 2014

It's OK Deng, It's Really OK...

To the Mom of a Nursing Toddler

It’s ok that you’re the only one who can get your child to take a nap.
It’s ok that you’re the only one who can put your child to sleep at night.
It’s ok that you can’t imagine a night away from your child.
It’s ok that you can imagine a night away from your child.
It’s ok that you sometimes resent your child’s very big need for you.
It’s ok that you sometimes feel so full with radiant love when you think of your child’s very big need for you.
It’s ok that your child always, sometimes, “still” nurses in the middle of the night.
It’s ok that you offer to nurse your child when you are tired and you want to sit still on the couch for a few minutes.
It’s ok that you offer to nurse your child to ward off a tantrum.
It’s ok that you “still” offer the breast.
It’s ok that you sometimes really, really don’t want to nurse and you offer something else instead.
It’s ok that you sometimes feel touched out.
It’s ok that your skin sometimes crawls while you nurse.
It’s ok that you spend lots of nursing sessions zoned out on your phone.
It’s ok that you find warm, cozy pleasure in nursing your child.
It’s ok that you can’t imagine not sleeping right beside your child.
It’s ok that your child doesn’t sleep with you so much anymore.
It’s ok that you don’t know when you’ll wean.
It’s ok that you have no idea how your child will ever stop nursing.
It’s ok that you have a plan to gently, slowly wean your child.
It’s ok that you want to speed things along with weaning.
It’s ok that your nursing toddler nurses more than your friend’s nursing toddler.
It’s ok that your nursing toddler nurses less than your friend’s nursing toddler.
It’s ok that nursing glues the two of you together, and you “still” often feel lost when you are separated from your child.
It’s ok to wonder when you will have your life back, your body back, your sleep back.
It’s ok to savor the smell of the two of you melding together.
It’s ok to not want your old life of “freedom” back.
It’s ok to want only this.
It’s ok to resent this.
It’s ok to feel all the feelings all at once.
All of it is normal.
Mammals have nursed their babies into toddlerhood and beyond for millions of years, feeling the complexity of emotions along the way.
Nursing never has and never will look just one way for every mother and child.
Listen to your child, listen to yourself.
Accept what is. Don’t read into things too much. Go with your instincts.
Feel the love.

Tuesday, June 18, 2013

I'm Sorry KAKAK


i realized lately, i easily get angry with you..
whatever you do, irritates me..
your stubbornness is killing my patience, (which i own very little of it)..
at the same time, i know, u always trying to please me, hard..


i always say things harshly at you..
never give you a chance to defends yourself..
its like i forgot, you are The Bless from Allah to me..
among the best things that Allah grants me..


for everything i said and did to you..
i know, i can't erase it from your memory..
but i do hope you forgive me, 
and look at it as it is the way how i show you my love..
i know it's the wrong way, but i'm still learning to find the right way..
to you and to me,
for the sake of both of us..

kita serupa?? sangat serupa?? jadi sebab tue mummy tak boleh tengok awak?? hopefully ini mitos kakak..because mummy sayang awak..sama macam mummy sayang adik..awak anak saya..mestilah saya sayang awak..hisyyy!! Serius kakak, 

but please, jangan buat saya marah..saya GARANG..apa punn, AMPUNKAN SAYA..MMUUAAAAHHHHHH!!!

Friday, June 14, 2013

The Feelings

Found this in FB..from a page called the wordings..I think all mothers would feel the same way..KIDS (of mine) this, print this & keep this at your bestest place..tq..

At first you moved,
only a little.
I could always find you,
right in the middle.
As time went on,
you really started to grow.
It wasn't a whole lot,
in fact, it was rather slow.

Before I knew it,
you were all over the place.
It kind of felt like,
you were running a race.

People would ask me,
if, you were a boy or a girl.
I would sit and wonder,
if, you would have curls.

There are so many things,
I really want to know.
But, you are hidden inside,
so the answers don't show.

How much will you weigh?
How tall will you be?
What color is your hair?
Will you even like me?

I hope and pray,
you feel like you belong.
I never want you to feel,
like you are alone.

Your Dad and I,
planned you from the start.
You, my dear child,
were made straight from our hearts.

In about a week or so,
I'll meet you, for the first time.
For you are the product,
of your Dad's love and mine.

There will be no one like you,
not any place in the world.
It really doesn't matter,
if you are a boy or a girl.

We are both so happy,
that you even exist.
The gender doesn't matter.
you'll be hard to resist.

I hope I make you proud,
that I am your mother everyday.
Because, you have filled my dreams,
in more ways, than words can say.

It won't be long before,
I can look you in the eyes.
I can feel the excitement growing,
I know I'm going to cry.

Don't worry my angel,
those tears will be of joy.
It won't matter to me,
if you are a girl or a boy

As the baby kicks around in the womb, the mother wonders what he or she will be like. One thing she knows for sure this baby will be loved unconditionally

Pregnancy: a commitment that sets love unconditionally..Pregnancy is the privilege of experiencing God's miracles on earth
"In my flesh I see the mark of God". Nowhere is this more apparent than in the experience of a pregnancy.

Watching and feeling this little miracle grow inside you, knowing that one day you will hold this child in your hands is one of the greatest gifts that can be experienced.♥

Thursday, June 13, 2013


The kids are growing up..up up & away!!! She is 7 this year..more n more n more like me..and very close to her Daddy..she's a typical Daddy's me lar, truly Anak Apak..ahaks..what's new??? And he is 6 this my little shadow..wherever i go, he'll be there..cuddling, playing, SULKING!! Hisy..very garang, also like me..what's new???

This blog of mine is soooooo bersawang..why??, Facebook is a totally distracted to this blogging..teruk kan?? and also because my writing skill (ada ker??) is already berkarat..hukhukhuk..

There are so many things to tell and update..but i don't know where to better don't start?? hahahahaaha..yeah..if not i'll having prob on how to stop it..again, another excuse..ok..will pay a visit again, when i am rajin..bila?? when i am rajin..;)

Tuesday, February 22, 2011


Songwriters: Caillat, Colbie Marie; Fagen, Timothy James; Mraz, Jason Thomas;

Do you hear me? I'm talking to you
Across the water across the deep blue ocean
Under the open sky, oh my, baby I'm trying

Boy I hear you in my dreams
I feel your whisper across the sea
I keep you with me in my heart
You make it easier when life gets hard

I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again
Ooh ooh ooh

They don't know how long it takes
Waiting for a love like this
Every time we say goodbye
I wish we had one more kiss
I'll wait for you I promise you, I will

I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
( From: )
Lucky to be coming home again

Lucky we're in love in every way
Lucky to have stayed where we have stayed
Lucky to be coming home someday

And so I'm sailing through the sea
To an island where we'll meet
You'll hear the music fill the air
I'll put a flower in your hair

Though the breezes through trees
Move so pretty you're all I see
As the world keeps spinning 'round
You hold me right here, right now

I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again

I'm lucky we're in love in every way
Lucky to have stayed where we have stayed
Lucky to be coming home someday

Ooh ooh ooh
Ooh ooh ooh, ooh


Friday, March 26, 2010

Senang sangat teka teki tue

Since i was small, i like to play puzzle with Apak and my brothers..everytime we got the chance to sit together, we always gave each other teka-teki that for us, still new and hard for others to get the answer..sometimes, saja jer bagi peluang 2-3 hari to get an's the same thing when i met my cousin..and i always gave them the right answer..until one stage, before my cousin gave me a teka-teki, he'll say, "malas aa bagi teka-teki kat awak..awak boleh jawab.." Hahahaha..kebetulan lar li...

Like, binatang apa yang kaya?? Binatang apa yang kedekut?? And, kenapa piano jatuh dari kapal terbang?? U can try and give me the answer..i'll tell you whether you are wrong or right..

I still remember my brother, Adan, once he gave me a sounds like this, "kenapa aiskrim cair di tengah panas??" He was 7 at that i took some time to answer his smartest and brightest teka-teki..sadly for him, i gave the right answer lar kan..duh!!
And when my husband joined our family, dia punn tumpang sekaki the excitement of main teka-teki with us..but i love his latest teka-teki most..

Last tuesday, and also his birthday, he was sent to Sarawak to attend a meeting..and I forgot to bring my phone on that day..later on the afternoon he gave me a call.."u dapat tak mms i??" so i told him i left my phone..and he said, "cuba teka i jumpa siapa?? I ambik gambar dengan siapa td?? Siapa lagi hensem??"

Hahahaahaha..i said, "Dr Fazley lar.." hahahahahaha..and he was soooo surprised.."There are over 5.6 billions manusia kat dunia nie, macam mana u boleh teka yang betul??" hahahaha..Daddy, senang sangat teka-teki tue..i punn tak tau macam mana i boleh jawab..tapi i tau lar itu jawapannya..seriously guys, my husband tue frust punn yea jugak..i tak tau, sebab i gave him the right answer or sebab i gave him that answer..

Hubby told me, he asked Fazley either they can take photo or not?? And then siap he told Fazley, "my wife minat sangat kat u.." hahahahaha..i terharu..and i also malu k..hahahaha..being A Fazley, of coz lar boleh kan (ayat-ayat yang akan buat my husband rasa cam nak campak i keluar dari kereta..)..and then my husband said, "i nak tanya dia, siapa lagi hensem.." Spontaneously Fazley said, "of coz lar dia kata husband dia.." and my husband said, dalam hati dia, "mm..yea sangat lar tue.." hahahaha..still, i luv u lar maan...

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Happy Birthday Dear Hubby

Happy Birthday Maan

I draw a circle, not a heart, around you
My husband, the one I love
Because a heart can break
But a circle goes on forever.

Happiness is being married to my best friend
Who understands me and knows me..

Deng Anaz



We are little
But we love you

Happy Birthday Daddy

Aneen & Ayyen

May Allah Bless U
and Give Us Barakah